It may be a result of the overly casual dating world in which I exist where formal dates are as rare as marriage proposals, but generally I cannot physically stand a first date. The combination of forced conversation over a meal wrapped in usually conflicting manners and expectations is worth avoiding. There is no fairy godmother and the ball is usually a trying to be fancy Italian restaurant where you order the cheapest thing on the menu because you feel bad that you won’t be paying (the only thing worse is if you do end up paying for your shitty choice of a meal.)
This is all very pessimistic and Oprah would say that I am coming from “a place of no,” but the anxiety I feel before a first date is rarely worth it in the end. I have found myself nervous to get into the position in which a first date would occur…I know, wishful thinking…but, the more you hype it up, the greater the disappointment.
Maybe I should be cool with a free bowl of pasta with marinara sauce (no meatball, he’s only a college student!) and the fact that someone is willing to put themselves through the theatrics of the overrated event.
Still, my favorite “first date” is the one that comes after several encounters within group settings, or chance run ins when you know you like each other and the formality of the date is just putting things in motion.
Now I want to go on a date.